How to Beat a False Restraining Order
Author: Drew P. SpaethIn today's political climate, divorce has become a cottage industry & one result has been a huge increase in the filing of false restraining orders in divorce cases. Most often, this affects the man in the divorce. If you are in this situation, you must learn how to beat a restraining order if you are to have any future contact with your children & save your reputation. This article will get you pointed in the right direction. Do not make the mistake of being unprepared. The road to defending yourself is full of pitfalls, any one of which could land you in jail!
One single false accusation from your spouse can have you hit with a false restraining order & subject to criminal prosecution. What is worse, the burden of proof is on YOU! That is right, she has no burden of proof, but you do.
Some unscrupulous lawyers will advise women to file a restraining order because:
1. It is a way to get quick custody of the children WITHOUT a hearing (yes, this CAN happen!)
2. It is a way to maximize alimony & child support payments.
There are two key concepts you need to master in order to learn how to beat a restraining order:
1. You need to become an expert on the restraining order process.
2. You need to take an active role in your case.
As stated in the intro, divorce has become an industry. No one knows the details of your situation better than you do, & no one will look after your best interests better than you. That is why hiring a lawyer to take care of things for you may be the worst thing you can do. You need to be knowledgeable on restraining orders & active in your defense to be successful.
One thing you should NEVER do after a restraining order has been filed is to attempt reconciliation with your wife. Even something as simple as an I'm sorry note or flower delivery violates the order & will land you in JAIL. That is why it is so important for you to become informed. There are too many mistakes like this waiting to happen.
You now have a basic outline on how to beat a restraining order. It is now up to you to become an expert. Your reputation & your children depend on it
i really need help with this my wife has made over 10 or 12 false reports that i haved called her and left sevaral messages on her phone. when in fact i lived with one of her friends and he often used my cellular phone i was setup. and embaresed in front of the court. i now have a one year injunction against me and am not allowed to see my daughter. how do i fight this
ReplyDeleteHe should have testified to this at the restraining order hearing. Now, she has an injunction against you. You will have to try and get back before the judge for a modification hearing of the injunction. Try calling the judges chambers, and ask to be placed on his court docket.
ReplyDeleteAt this time, you better have all your witnesses together. better yet to retain a lawyer, if you can afford one.
My wife claimed that I violently shoved her into the door of our kitchen and used this as her lie to get a restraining order. My hearing is in one week. In her testimony she wrote that after I shoved her I walked outside with our daughter into the rain. I have looked up the weather data for this particular day and it was not raining. It had not rained for two weeks prior to the date of her allegations and it had not rained two weeks after this date. This is the only provable lie in her testimony. Is this enough to have a TRO thrown out.
ReplyDeleteProbably not I am afraid. If your daughter sides with your wife, it will not matter. Your wife will probably get the restraining order granted, no matter what. But it is worth trying to catch her in a Lie. As always, it will depend on the Judge.
ReplyDeleteDefeated Dad writes...
ReplyDeleteMy wife has gotten a Restraining Order when in fact In have never harmed her or intended to harm her or my children. She wrote that I had a weapon, and that I threatened to shoot my twin 13 month old girls in the head. The judge heard both sides, asked her if she wanted the RO, and it was granted with the modification that I could see my girls. When I ran to the daycare that same day, she filed a ex parte for custody banning me any contact. The same judge heard the request, I was too busy crying at the daycare I couldnt see them. Its been 17 days, dont know how much longer I can last. Help!!
I would see a lawyer as soon as possible, and fight the order keeping you from your children.
ReplyDeleteThe longer she is successful at keeping you from your children, the more likely she will be rewarded legal custody of them.
It is very common, in a divorce or custody battle, to use the legal system against you, by lying to get restraining orders.
My boyfriend and I got into a fight and he pushed me and my neighbors talked me into getting a restraining order against him. We broke up and got back togather and I went to the court house to get it lifted and judge denied it. We then about a month ago got in a fight at my work and the police came and arrested him. He has a prior domestic violence conviction. Is there anything I can do to get him out of this?? Can I get the order lifted somehow??? Whats going to happen to him??? This is in Broward county, Florida. Please help.
ReplyDeleteWas there a restraining order in place when you guys got into a fight at your work place ?
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I are in the beginning stages of a divorce in NC. In fact, neither party has filed for legal separation as of yet. On Thursday afternoon, she accused me of damaging her Vinyl Cutting Machine 'on purpose', to impede her Home based business. After fixing the machine (one of the wires needed to be reconnected), she announced 'that was it', and filed a 'Domestic Abuse Protective Order', having me removed from my residence, and not allowing me to see our Daughter. The order was scheduled to be served on Friday morning, but she decided that because it was filed 'out of anger', and that I was not a danger to either her or my daughter, she called the Sheriff to have the order dissolved, but was obviously told that 'it was too late' and the order had to be served, and we would have to appear in court. Any advice on beating this one, as it was filed under false pretenses, and there are logged calls from her to the Sheriff, requesting the order be dropped. Thanks.
ReplyDeletemy wife has accused me of being abusive and has taken my child when there is no prior abuse claims to anyone in my family and there has never been the cops out to my place and i have all of my sons stuff from medications to clothes i am the primary care provider for my child because she hasn't worked in a year and half and hasn't tried me and my mom take care of my son and she hasn't accused me of abusing him and my son will spend 50% or more of the time at my moms house as long as me and my wife and we spent 20 days or more at my moms house this last month before all these things happened i need to know what are the odds of me getting a counter and getting temporarily custody till this is all straightened out
ReplyDeletei took a route of "judge theres no record of violence in my history
ReplyDeletethis order is not her aginist me. its the state taking away my constutional rights for a crime that hasent happened . its been almost 2 years how much longer is the state going to take away my rights without charging me a crime??
the judge looked over the paperwork and dissmissed the order
Concerned Sister writes. . .
ReplyDeleteMy brother had been with this girl for a little over a year now and for the past several months, she's been playing the "I still love you" game but turning around and slandering him and my family all over the internet. I CAN get the proof to back this up but she persists in making us believe she's the "good guy" when me and my parents know she isn't. She use to live with us and would NOT support her stay, even after my dad told her she couldn't move in with us, and around November of last year - she moved out by telling us she was going to spend a few days with her mom to do laundry. Well the past couple of weeks, she's been avoiding my brother for this other guy and as the fool in love like he was, he was trying to see what she was doing. She would stand him up, lie to him, and just a couple of days ago, he was served an Order of Protection which I'm told is TRO for stalking her, abusing her, and harassing her. How can I help my brother? How can my brother win this?
Also, I was told TRO stay on record. A few years ago, his girlfriend at the time (who was big into drugs) filed a TRO against him too, saying he threw dishes at her and threw her against walls. He won that case but my biggest worry is, if the judge sees he's had one TRO already filed against him, how can my brother avoid any consequences this time around?
Sincerely,
Worried Younger Sister.
I have a restraining order against me. there are 10 statements that are false, altered, and in addition omissions.. In our relationship she welcomed help to find a job. On the other hand she did not tell me I could not visited her unexpectedly, while she visited 2 times a week for a month, and burst in the door while my mom was at my place on April 28th. She was told as well to contact me before coming over, but neither she nor her Independent Living Skill worker did anything to alert me Kelly was coming over. The day she moved her stuff out, she was told by the property manager to stay at her new place, until her stuff arrived. She didn’t do that and came back 2 times, looking through closets, cupboards, bedrooms, the kitchen and the bathroom. Legally because the lease for her ended Tuesday may 1st, she should have not been over here at all. Her family did nothing to move Kelly far away from me. Keeping her in the same neighborhood approximately 300 ft from my front door. The ILS worker didn’t do anything from stopping unwanted visits and her going through the house looking for things. Kelly also tried to take many of my personal items. I have not received them all back yet. Kelly also tried to co hearse my ILS worker against me.
ReplyDeleteMy husband was convicted on a domestic violence charge back in 1989. He served 45 days in jail and had to attend an anger management class. We have lived in Tampa, FL for 28 yrs and during the last 26 yrs, he has held a job. Now, ever since they passed the JENNIFER LUMSTEN ACT which deals with child molestation, employers are now banning all persons with any kind of conviction that deals with bodily harm to another person. Even though domestic violence in not a felony, employers are treating it as such. My husband cannot get a job anywhere because of this. As soon as they do a backround check, they never call him back. Even the day labor places won't send him out. Damn. He was convicited once and now he is bannned from ever holding another job? He's not old enough to retire. What can he do? We are now going to loose our home because I don't make enough to cover the mortgage without his help. Got any suggestions?
ReplyDeleteContact the EEOC at 800-669-4000 asap
DeleteHere in Tampa Florida, it is very easy to do a criminal records background check, simply by going to the Hillsborough County Sheriffs Website. I feel bad for your husband, and any other victims of the Police State that the America of today has become. It used to be if you made a mistake, you could move to another state, and start over.
ReplyDeleteNow, the Computers of today never forget, or let you forget about a past mistake.
Your Husband is screwed, to put it bluntly.
He can try a Legal Name change, but then they can get him by his social security number, if they check his past that way.
Your Husband will be better off working for himself.
im in the military i was gone most of my sons life before that my childs mother refused to move in while she was on maturnity leave she stayed at her familys house wich is 127 miles from where i worked and lived i was not able to quite and move closer to her because my job paid our bills. when i returned from over seas she moved in and we lived together for 4 mounths when the money dried up she left and moved away. i was medically laid of from my jobs shortly after and had an job closer to my son when she found out she filed an order of protection on me knowing i couldnt work at that job with one. court on tuesday what do i do ive never hurt her in my life i have never raised a hand on women in my life how do i beat this
ReplyDeleteUnless we enforce the 2nd Ammendemnt then all of our rights will be taken away and we'll eventually end up in FEMA camps. If they really wanted to protect people they would do their job and hold dangerousness hearings on actual criminal complaints. Time for another Tea Party.
ReplyDeletei have been charged with stalking before a po was granted,she has filed bogas reports,made me come over by calling me and acting like we are working on us to get arested for trasspasing,after a falce report from the BIA and wont let me see the report and has used it to file all the charges on me and that was after the cops tryed to manipulate her to do this so thay can attach my ssi back pay and im at ends linth with this ---- if you know what i mean
ReplyDeleteMy ex girlfriend had filed a false claim that I came to her work and tried to talk to her after she had told me to k eave her a lone. The truth wasbi was hanging with my friend alex at my apartment. Will his testimony prove me innocent? Or do I need to do the extra step and ask her job for video tapes of that day to prove that I wasnt even on the premises?
ReplyDeleteMy son in law was arrested for domestic assault and battery on me....police report at court.....and he was granted the protective order for 5 yrs......how did this even happen
ReplyDelete......how will this effect me as a teacher..volunteer..etc. Please please guide me
Different states are different. Here in Tampa Florida, it is very easy to do a criminal records background check, simply by going to the Hillsborough County Sheriffs Website. I feel bad for you, and any other victims of the Police State that the America of today has become. It used to be if you made a mistake, you could move to another state, and start over.
ReplyDeleteNow, the Computers of today never forget, or let you forget about a past mistake.
You could be screwed as a future teacher and volunteer, to put it bluntly.
Having a restraining order granted against you makes YOU look bad! It can even effect your credit rating!
Many places will refuse to take a chance on you , once a restraining order has been filed against you, in case of a lawsuit.
Think about it ?
If they were to hire you, and you ever did really lose your temper and hit someone, they could be sued for negligence for hiring, and ignoring the restraining order that had been filed previously against you.
Even if the restraining order was granted under false circumstances, once it shows up on your police record, you will spend the rest of your life "proving" you are not violent, or a bad person.
my Ex-fiance put a restraining order on me i go to court on 5-21-13 its a permanent protection order hearing here in colorado most of the stuff she claims is false but i gotta prove other wise and i didnt keep ant records of anything cause i trusted her what can i do i already hired a lawyer. does anyone have any suggestions. please help its my credability here at stake
ReplyDeleteTrust your Lawyer Jesse, and fight the restraining order as best you can. Try and get witnesses who have seen the 2 of you together, to prove she is in no danger from you.
ReplyDelete